I don't know how we got here.
We thought of ourselves as good parents and the big boy as a good kid.
But despite our best of intentions, things began to unravel. Without casting blame on anyone, because really that does no one any good…. I can tell you this: My dear friend Nancy in the roughest hours said to me in a gentle loving tone…. why not you. And she's right. Hard things happen to the best of people all the time, so why not us.
There is no time to try and make sense of something that does not. It just is. So instead you carry on, pick up the pieces and try to keep doing the best you know how to do.
In the midst of selling and buying our home, of moving, of having our family in different places….. everything we knew fell apart. We made the swift decision to pull him out of school for the rest of the semester and send him to the only constant we had in that moment. Grandma & Grandpa's (my parents).
It is an act of love and humility to ask for help. To take a much needed break. To step back and reassess and try again. I left Louisiana with tears in my eyes for a hundred reasons. One of which was not knowing what was to come for our family.
Being a parent is tough sometimes. Being a teenager is tough too. And here we are….. nearly five months later. He spent the last few months working 40+ hours a week at a fish cannery, throwing fifty pound boxes of fresh fish around. We all got a much needed breather. In pictures I have seen his smile return and his shoulders bulk up with muscle. I have heard the boy I know return to his voice over the phone. I have held hope so tightly in my heart I thought I might crush her.
I wanted to tell you all so many times…. I just couldn't find the words. Or perhaps the bravery.
In a few hours we'll drive to the airport to pick up my mom and the big boy. Tender hearts turning a page. Walking this bumpy road with love is the only way to do it. It's the only thing to get you through the roughest of spots.
Love, love, love my friends.
Wish us luck.