and now…..

and now....

Wow.

I wasn't really sure what would happen on Friday when I shared that post. I wondered if perhaps a mass exodus would un-subscribe and run fleeing away thinking I was either crazy or certainly far from the image in their minds. But then you all just surprised me in your sweet little ways by sending tons of love in your comments and emails. Thank you.

Of course, I'm also trying to figure out how the heck I follow a post like that. "Here, have a lemon scone recipe." That doesn't really work does it? I mean, lemon scones are good and all…. but it's just sort of a trivial follow up to pouring a piece of your soul out onto a computer screen and receiving such love.

All those courageous words you shared had me thinking these past few days. Over and over you told me that you wanted to spill your own confessions. Say it like it is. Be brave. Many of you told me you struggled with feeling good enough… and I think this is what blew my mind the most. Why, as women, do we have these unreal expectations of what we should do? Of how people should perceive us? Why do we spend so much energy being "good"? We cook, clean, volunteer, work a job, raise kids, help our friends & family, and so much more. But we don't make enough time for us. And worse, we put on a facade all too often. You know, we play nice.

I think some of getting things done & taking care of business is unavoidable….. but self care should also make that to-do list. Taking a tiny speck of time to ourselves every day. Sharing coffee or wine with people that make us laugh until we cry. Writing, painting, gardening, meditating, cooking, playing music, or whatever makes your heart sing. We overextend and we give so much that we have little left when giving to ourselves. We're spread so thinly that we lose the joy of living in this moment…. this beautiful life. What the crap, right? I mean why is this such a common thread in our culture?

I want you all to know. You totally and completely freaking rock. For reals. If you can get up and walk through your day with love in your heart…. you are doing it right. I don't care if you pour your pasta sauce from a jar or make it from the garden…. in the end no one is going to give a shit about the pasta sauce. Nobody is going to care if you dusted. The love is what's gonna count. Don't be so hard on yourself. Be brave. Be courageous. Be real. We can be and do and love so much more as a tribe, as sisters. And I am grateful and humble to have you be a part of mine.

With Love,

Stephinie

34 thoughts on “and now…..

  1. I wrote a long comment about your previous post, lurking, and leaving comments … and typepad deleted it! Which kind of says it all really. In short – I wish I’d left a comment on your previous post, because it touched my heart, and I believe in acknowledging it when someone does that. This post here touched my heart even more, so here I am commenting, which I should do more often except things happen like typepad deleting long comments, and then time running out. Blessings to you and thanks for all you write.

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  2. Hi Stephinie, As I like to remind myself occasionally – Life can’t be put on hold- it’s what’s happening NOW. By the way – the lemon scones do sound good.

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  3. steph, ive been to your blog quite often lately, and i want to thank you for your words! Your so brave and its people like you who make the rest of us realize we arent that bad, just give it your best and it is what it is! Thank you so much!Love ya

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  4. lemon scones…sounds good to me!
    I like what you have said here, and definitely, do what makes your heart sing. Visiting you here makes my heart sing…and obviously a whole lot of other peoples too.
    Much love

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  5. This was a great follow-up post and you absolutely rock!!!!! but could you send over some Lemon Scones ? because those just sounded so good.
    You have been a part of my online life for so long now. I’m so glad we are sisters of the visiting blogs and in the same tribe. Here’s to you…..all of you. Big hugs.

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  6. So beautifully written!!
    Why is it that women are always giving to take care of everyone else, while neglecting themselves? It’s so sad!! Even worse when we do tend to ourselves, then feel guilty and selfish for doing so. But if we don’t take care of us, recharge our batteries, we’ll have nothing left to give to others.
    I love lemon, and scones. Put them together…bliss! πŸ™‚

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  7. Oh that typepad is a pain in the a** sometimes when you’re trying to type out comments. I’m so humbled that these last two pieces spoke to you. I never anticipated the response they received. I’m so grateful for having connected with my readers and for all the love! Thank you.
    xo much love…
    ~Stephinie

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  8. Thank you Shasta… I’m so happy you enjoyed them. Being a mama and wife are an amazingly hard & rewarding job to have. Some days are awesome and some are just junk. But when you see all those happy boys in your life you gotta know you are doing something right. Much love πŸ™‚
    ~steph

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  9. Valarie, you will LOVE the scones! I’ll share the recipe by the end of the week.
    I’m so glad we’ve been blog sisters all these years too. You’ve been here so long…. I’m very grateful for your friendship. Much love πŸ˜‰
    ~s

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  10. I know right! It makes me crazy sometimes… you have it right though. If we don’t recharge, we run out of the ability to give. Thank you for your kind words and YES, lemon scones in the next day or so πŸ™‚
    xo
    ~stephinie

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  11. I love reading your posts! I love that you are brave enough to share your heart and your real thoughts.
    You’re are so right, when it’s all said and done no one is really going to care about what you made for dinner on 1/25/2012 but they will care where your heart was and who you were and how you loved:) But I would love the scone recipe too when you have a chance..haha! LOVE you!!

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  12. Simply eloquent. I have been reading your blog for just under a year now, and have never commented. Until now. Your last 2 posts have voiced the inner struggle I myself have, and I am sure considering the responses many others. Especially in blog land, we dont want to ‘fess up that our houses need dusting, that we are furstrated with our husbands at moments, that kids dont come home happy and respectful each day, that we may swear and cry from just a bad day. Nope blog land is beautiful, and skewing in perception. I find your vocalization (is that a word) liberating. Thank you!
    I am off to NOT dust my house now and be ok with it!

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  13. This is a tough one for me, admittedly. I have this hang up about the house being clean before I do anything fun or creative. But I'm working on it. Slowly getting there….. 
    I'm seriously digging all the love from everyone πŸ™‚ And yes, the scone recipe is coming this morning! xoxo
    ~Stephinie

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  14. Yes, yes, yes! All of what you said. And while I'm not ever going to get on this space and specifically rant about someone in my house… I just wanted my readers to know sometimes they drive me nuts and most of all I am SO not perfect. I was so tired of seeing everyone's fluff, you know? Only the perfect sparkly stuff. I'm so happy to know this post spoke to you & that you said hello too. I always like to "meet" who's hanging out here πŸ™‚
    much love~~
    stephinie

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  15. Stephinie, I enjoy reading your comments back to readers through typepad dashboard. I think you need to start a “confessions of crunchy motherhood” thing. Here’s my confession of the night: I feed my chickens conventional feed. Wow…I feel so much lighter now. I’ve got more where that came from too….:)

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  16. Guess what? When we had chickens at our last house…. we did too! I don't buy organic peanut butter either. Lissadell saw mine in the lunch bag the other day and said to me "hey, I buy that kind too!" We laughed at that. And then talked about rejoicing in doing what you can do. No matter how big or little that might be. You know? I wish we are looking in at sweet baby Josefine right now….. I can only imagine the three of us would have a grand time together. xo sweet mama πŸ˜‰
    ~s

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